The Human Advantage

By Shannon Green

As a kid, I prayed to God for Barbie dolls, long hair and one very specific request: “Please let Dad die.”

My father, Rick Owens, was volatile. His temper, mood and behavior were as unpredictable as the disease that robbed a Chicago city kid of his corporate ladder dream at Frito-Lay’s Dallas headquarters, where he was among the company’s first Black managers in the ’80s.

I resented him for the ways he hurt us. I resented multiple sclerosis and the constant disruption it brought to our lives—physically, emotionally and financially. I resented being a 14-year-old visiting my dad’s nursing home on weekends instead of hanging out with friends.

But mostly, I felt deep and indescribable grief watching my dad’s life wither away. He enjoyed being active. Long after his college basketball days, he was a competitive recreational tennis athlete, enjoyed archery and shared an incredible athletic lineage as the nephew of Olympic track star Jesse Owens.

In eight years he transitioned from having a slight limp to being bedridden and unable to feed himself. He was angry at the world, and I was angry with him.

But a shift happened during our last visit. We enjoyed watching Golden Girls on his TV and chatted like friendly strangers. At one point, I realized he never called me by my name or referred to me as his daughter. When I called him “Dad,” he looked at me strangely. Something felt off. I knew his condition was further impaired by a stroke—a fact my mom informed me of before I saw him. Years later, I learned he had also developed dementia.

He was only 45 years old—the youngest person at his nursing home.

Leaving that day, I felt overwhelmed with compassion for him. My world was expanding with new teenage ideas and experiences as his world was shrinking to the four walls of his bedroom.

No one deserved to live like this. I wanted God to release him from suffering.

“God, please let Dad die,” I prayed in my head during a silent ride home.

Any lingering resentment faded as my heart flooded with tenderness. About a month later, my dad was gone. And so were the rest of the stories about his life I never learned.

This is in large part why I spent most of my adult life as an Emmy Award-winning journalist and communications expert, diving into complex stories about the human experience.

People are complex and fascinating creations of God, worthy of discovery and understanding.

As I approach 45 this summer—the same age my father was when he died—I often reflect on those experiences and how they shaped my life, work and perspective on empathy. Loss is an unwelcome but wise teacher. We often move through our days expecting and planning for tomorrow, but as the prayer of Moses reminds us:

“Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom” (Psalm 90:12, NLT).

Wisdom guides us to the narrow paths of discomfort over the wide rotundas of familiarity so we can mature in our faith and understanding.

Learning to sit with discomfort and practicing curiosity with things we don’t understand stretches beyond character refinement. These “soft skills” are hallmark values for storytellers and are essential for anyone leading a team or organization.

EMPATHY AT WORK

Empathy is more than personal virtue; it’s a business advantage. A 2021 Catalyst study, led by social psychologist Tara van Bommel, surveyed 900 employees in the United States and found that empathy is an important driver of employee outcomes such as innovation, engagement and inclusion.

To understand how empathy plays out in the workplace, we must first define it. Catalyst research defines empathy as a two-part skill: mastery of connection and application. People who can identify and understand thoughts, perspectives and emotions and also apply intention, care and concern to these nuanced experiences operate in empathy.

Empathetic leadership is vital in industries like health care, where clinicians and team members care for others during moments of crisis every day. Leaders who actively listen and show compassion for frontline workers create a culture of psychological safety that reduces burnout and improves patient outcomes.

Instinctively, we know workplace empathy is good for business and the soul, but delivering it is tricky. According to the 2024 Businessolver Workplace Empathy Monitor report, 50% of U.S. employees and 55% of CEOs cited a mental health issue in the past year. Executive leadership saw a 24-point increase from the previous year.

This may reflect increased transparency around workplace well-being—or a growing crisis in emotional fatigue. Either way, it signals a need for intentional strategies that make empathy a value and a practiced discipline in our day-to-day leadership.

WHAT OTHER CULTURES CAN TEACH US

Empathy is a valued practice worldwide. In Japan, the concept of “omoiyari”—a deep sense of empathy and consideration for others—has long been ingrained in lifestyle and business engagement.

Omoiyari principles aim to anticipate the needs of others. For example, according to Tokhimo.com, a Japanese company review and job platform, people often stack their utensils and wipe the table before leaving a restaurant out of consideration for the workers.

When the COVID-19 vaccine was introduced, the Japanese government also practiced omoiyari by providing the vaccine form in 17 languages. They did that to accommodate many foreign residents living in Japan so they fully understood and had the option to get vaccines comfortably like the locals.

In a recent episode of The Responsible Edge podcast, Swedish-born leader Malin Cunningham emphasized empathy to accelerate sustainable life and work culture.

In Sweden, for example, children are taught to value empathy and collaboration early in their education. Instead of being segregated by abilities and achievements (high-achieving students are only grouped with like students), everyone works together, filling in skill gaps. High achievers have the opportunity to learn supportive collaboration skills instead of focusing on individualistic performance.

Scandinavian countries are known to be less hierarchical and prioritize flat organizational structures. They encourage open dialogue between leaders and employees. However, this means you won’t get quick decisions or speed to market.

Culture influences how—and sometimes even if—empathy is systemically implemented. American culture, for instance, prioritizes autonomy, speed and mass productivity. But if we’re not mindful, these values can erode empathy—which goes against the very heart of Jesus.

Before performing one of His greatest miracles—feeding the 5,000—Jesus was first moved by compassion (see Matthew 14:13-21). When the crowds followed Him into the countryside, His disciples wanted to send them away to find food. But Jesus said, “You feed them.” He took what little they had—five loaves and two fish—and multiplied it. In business language, Jesus scaled the pilot program.

We often focus on the provision. But we miss the compassion that made the miracle possible.

LEADING WITH EMPATHY

Meeting individual needs can seem daunting for any CEO, department or team leader. This is exactly why storytellers and communicators are uniquely positioned to help leaders foster an intentional culture of empathy.

As a former journalist, I saw the power of empathy firsthand, both inside and outside the newsroom. Practicing curiosity, engaging research and creating community connections allows storytellers to understand, anticipate and amplify an audience’s voice.

In 2018, I led a documentary project on ex-felons, preferably called returning citizens, seeking the opportunity to have voting rights restored after completing their sentences. The ballot initiative excluded ex-felons who committed murder or had a felony sex offense but offered thousands a pathway back into civic life.

There were many empathy examples and lessons from that experience, but one powerful moment stays with me. A Tampa-based attorney—bright, informed and eloquent—I interviewed was staunchly against the ballot initiative.

His sister had been murdered, and that pain shaped his opposition, despite the facts of the initiative—which excluded anyone convicted of murder.

Months later, I organized and hosted a community town hall discussion and documentary screening. Our panel discussion included proponents and opponents of the legislation, including the attorney.

Consensus was not the goal of the discussion. We sought understanding, which meant leaning into discomfort and curiosity to allow everyone’s unique perspective to be heard. The conversation was honest, meaningful and deeply human.

Empathy allowed us to hold precious space for learning.

“You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry” (James 1:19, NLT).

So, how do we infuse empathy into our daily leadership practices, whether it’s in the workplace, community or your home? Here are three actionable strategies:

Listen to understand, not to react. One of the most powerful lessons I learned as a journalist was the art of listening. As a former columnist, my job was to gather facts to take a position, advocate a cause and highlight the human spirit in an entertaining and engaging way that served readers. This also meant regularly engaging dissatisfied readers who passionately disagreed with me. When I was younger, I’d devote too much time putting together eloquently worded emails to “win over” a reader.

But as I matured, I learned this wasn’t always the best approach. I once wrote a story about a former Vietnam veteran sharing part of his traumatic life story. Although he wanted to share his story and knew what I was writing, seeing this in print triggered him. I received a disrespectful email and phone call that could have easily put me in a defensive position. Instead, I leaned into my empathy skills. I called and left him a message apologizing for the pain the article caused. That simple act led to the reader calling me back and apologizing for an overreaction that had nothing to do with the article but his own trauma journey. That experience taught me to practice greater care and discernment when handling sensitive stories.

In a leadership context, this can mean practicing the art of detachment when you’re on the receiving end of someone’s dysregulation. Remove the focus on yourself and get curious about what is happening with your team members. We’re not just holders of productivity but stewards of God’s people.

Tip: After a team member shares something sensitive, respond with, “How can I support you . . . ?” This simple technique ensures they feel heard and allows you to clarify any misunderstandings.

Embrace vulnerability. Brené Brown, a renowned researcher on vulnerability and courage, argues that vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation and creativity. Leaders willing to share their challenges build trust and foster deeper connections.

This doesn’t mean you are required to share your deepest, darkest traumas with your colleagues. In fact, we must be intentional and mindful about how much of our hearts we share and who has access to it. Why? Because we need to be personally healed before we offer up testimonies. However, we can share work failure or fear stories with teams to break through perfectionism and build courage.

For example, sharing moments of uncertainty during organizational change can make leaders more relatable. It creates space for others to express their concerns without fear of judgment.

“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness’” (2 Corinthians 12:9).

Tip: Start team meetings with “wins and lessons” rather than “wins and losses.” This reframing normalizes learning from mistakes and encourages open dialogue.

Personalize your approach. Every person is unique. What motivates one person may not resonate with another. Understanding individual strengths, communication styles and career aspirations helps tailor your leadership approach.

A Gallup study found that managers who focus on their team members’ strengths experience a 14-29% increase in profit. Personalized leadership isn’t about playing favorites—it’s about meeting people where they are, serving them and helping them grow.

Tip: Use tools like CliftonStrengths or DiSC assessments to gain insights into your team’s working styles. Then, apply that knowledge to delegate tasks and provide feedback that aligns with their strengths.

THE SACRED ACT OF LEADERSHIP

Empathy is not weakness, and it’s not soft. It requires incredible strength and discipline to set aside our judgments, be present in someone else’s reality and lead from a place of compassion. When leaders model empathy, it creates a ripple effect, fostering trust, collaboration and resilience.

Reflecting on my father’s life and my journey, I realize he taught me the power of tenderness and mercy. “Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony” (Colossians 3:14, NLT).

Empathy isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about having the courage and patience to sit in the room when the next step isn’t clear. It’s about making space for someone else’s humanity—even when messy or inconvenient.

It’s the quiet strength that whispers, “I see you. I’m with you. I will not rush past this moment.”

That is the kind of leadership that reflects the heart of Christ. The kind that transforms teams, rebuilds trust and can shift a company’s culture and, in time, impact a generation.

As I step into my own leadership journey, I carry the lessons my father never meant to teach me. The greatest gift we can offer each other—and ourselves—is to lead with compassion.

Because leading with empathy isn’t just a human advantage. It’s a holy one.